How do you define a bad way to start the day?
2005-02-15 at 5:42 p.m.
Take a morning, any morning, but it's best if it's one after you've been sick and you aren't still 100%. Where you were up grading until too late and now it's too early.Yeah, start just like that.
Leave the house without your apples that you want to take to work and leave there for when you're so damn hungry you hate life. Leave those at home. That'll help.
You know what else you should leave at home? Your ID badge and your key. That's a REALLY good idea.
Turns out they won't matter as much as they would have, though, because you should also throw in an accident on your highway to school. Traffic will back up like shit at a IAD convention. Even though you only have two miles left to go, it'll take you more than thirty minutes.
This way, you'll be late. And unprepared for ALL of your classes.
Have other teachers using your copier so you can't cram your prep in.
Start your first class of the day and receive three crank phone calls from a student. Ask every student in class to take out their cell phones and put them on their desk, go on with the lesson. End the period--a spectacularly unproductive one, by the way, wherein two students accuse you of sexism because you can't get two hyper girls to shut up--with one more crank phone call.
Go to your next class, unprepared. Have two students totally and completely flake on you. Step in gum. Then, when you try to load your data into your PDA, have it break. So you are forced to bring your laptop to class. Then, when using your laptop, sit on a gumdrop. For twenty minutes. And only realize you've done it when you stand up and feel your pants adhering to the chair.
For good measure, make it a red gumdrop.
To put a little cherry on this Bad Day Sundae, have eight students--in chorus--tell you to zip your fly when you stand up.
And now it's noon.
After all that, tell me how you feel. Because my day? She did not get better.
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